I always considered myself a hyperactive person. I’m always doing something and I hardly manage to just sit and do nothing but enjoy the moment. Maybe that’s my nature but I was also trained to be like this, never waste time, habit that for many moments in life helped me to achieve what I wanted, but on many other moments caused me anxiety, exhaustion and guiltiness for not being productive all the time.
However, the need of slowing down and setting a new pace in life increased even more after I became a mom (by mom read a stay at home mom, that takes care of the baby 24/7, manage everything at home by myself and still have many projects going on). Yeah. How to slowdown and breathe when there’s so much to do, see and live?
Today is the 3rd day of my solo trip with my 20 months old baby in New York City. The non-stop, extremely crowded, full of things to see and eat NYC. My baby just fell asleep now and I’m in a dilemma between putting her in the stroller and enjoy that she is quiet to have a moment for myself to walk around without a crying baby pressure, or to just sit on the couch, rest and give myself time to enjoy the silence.
We’ve spent more than 6 hours on the streets yesterday, walking more than 10 kilometers and although interesting my legs got sore and the baby wasn’t quite pleased to sit for so long, which made both of us upset at times and made me think how worth it is to go out for so long if this makes us stressed or overly tired despite the nice moments?
It’s time to
These intense but short years with a small baby will go by and there’s no need for rush. I need to learn to embrace the moment as it is and make the best out of it. I’m no longer alone and the well-being of my daughter depends on my choices. As much as I would love to go out right now, explore the city and get once more exhausted myself, I need to look after her and make sure she has a good rest to grow healthy and strong.
So I decided to take my time in the couch, not necessarily do anything but do everything I can (and there’s a lot) indoors while my child rest. I want her to grow-up curious and flexible but surely less anxious than me.
New York will always be here and this time I’m learning to live the city from a solo-mom point of view.